Why do firefighters rush to some buildings and not to others? I would love to be visited by firefighters at my office, with their charming hats and suits, and their friendly spotted dogs! They claim that other buildings are “on fire” and it is an “emergency” — well, where is my equal consideration? Simply because my office building has no fire in it, am I never going to get to see that beautiful red truck? I thought this was America!
I am so sad whenever I visit the hospital and see some people being offered new hips. Where is my offer of a new hip? And that’s not the half of it. Everywhere, I see inequality — antibiotics for some people, nothing for others! I demanded to know where my radiation was and the doctor looked frightened. He said that some people are battling tumors and they should have access to radiation before I do, but — I waved my decision at him. Just because you are actively battling a foe I’ve never had to face does not mean you get weapons and I don’t! This is America, and this is what equality means! Read it and weep!
You know what really grinds my gears? When I hear shouts of, “Here! Catch this rope and I will pull you out of the quicksand!” that are not directed at me. Why are some people being thrown free, helpful ropes, whereas I get nothing, simply because I am not quicksand-adjacent?
Every time I see someone trying to ameliorate a wrong that has been done to someone, I think: Is that fair to me, who has suffered no wrong? It doesn’t feel fair. It seems like I should also be able to get everyone in class to sign my cast! Why is that parking spot reserved for expectant mothers and not also open to me? Don’t I deserve redress, even though I don’t have a grievance?
I am sick and tired of people who have had adversity and obstacles handed out to them liberally since birth getting to be treated differently than those of us who haven’t. Do you know how hard some people have to work to encounter a single obstacle? There are some people who have not once had their abilities discounted, not once had doors shut in their faces, not once been obliged to prove their worth to someone who doubted it. Do you know how hard they had to work to find subjects for their college application essays? And yet some elite institutions had the temerity to insist that one factor among many other factors be something they could not control?
People should only be judged on things they can control, like how much tutoring they have been able to access, and whether or not someone spotted them at a young age and said, “Yes, Tripp will excel at lacrosse.” Character, merit, that’s what I insist upon! (Yes, there are still legacy admissions, but those judge you on important aspects of your character, like if your character is related to other characters who also went to your university.) Thanks to my efforts, a day of perfect justice is coming, a time when people who aren’t being rained on are offered precisely as many umbrellas as people who are. When no one, no matter who his father is, or his grandfather was, is denied an additional favor, simply because he is already brimming with favors. Then, we can approach something like the equality the Founders dreamed of. Then, finally, I can stop and rest.
