Sallah: Indy, there’s an ancient scroll you need to see.
Indiana: I’ve told you a million times, I’m retired.
Sallah: Perhaps, perhaps not.
Indiana: Look, I’ve seen things, strange things, inside caves, mostly, but that doesn’t mean I have to start missing meals every time you show up with a scroll. Now, where are my damn reading glasses?
—“Indiana Jones and the Pill Counter of Predetermination”
Sallah: Indy, you know I wouldn’t be coming to you if it wasn’t important.
Indiana: Sallah, look at us! We’re both so old we can barely walk, much less figure out how to find a priceless ancient object.
Sallah: I know, Indy. But the ancient mysteries—they are still out there waiting for us!
Indiana: O.K., O.K. Just help me up.
Sallah: I’m not sure I can.
Indiana: Here, hold on to one end of this bullwhip.
Sallah: Really?
Indiana: I don’t know. I’m making this up as I go.
—“Indiana Jones and the Catheter of Chaos”
Sallah: I swear this is the last time I’ll ask . . .
Indiana: We’ve already had this conversation. I’m pretty sure. Wait. Have we?
Sallah: We’ve had similar conversations.
Indiana: Ha. I knew it.
Sallah: But, Indy, I really think this is something you’ll want to investigate.
Indiana: Look, I’ve seen a few Nazis vaporized in my time, but maybe they deserved it? I mean, they were Nazis. . . . I’m sorry, what were we talking about?
Sallah: I don’t remember.
—“Indiana Jones and the Bed of Bewilderment”
Sallah: Indy, I really need your help with this.
Indiana: I told you, I’m retired! I’m out of the game!
Sallah: But they took my driver’s license away after I pressed down on the gas pedal instead of the brake, and now I need a ride to the all-night pharmacy.
Indiana: Start the engine!
—“Indiana Jones and the Final Errand”
Sallah: Indy, an amulet has gone missing . . .
Indiana: Who the hell are you?
Sallah: Your sidekick.
Indiana: Short Round?
Sallah: You’re having a bad day. Maybe it’s better if I come back another time.
Indiana: Marion?
Sallah: Oh, boy.
—“Indiana Jones and the Elusive Name” ♦
