While digital vaccine passports are being fiercely debated, consensus is forming round a number of different passports that may talk the extent of hazard you pose to the world.
Flip-Flops Passport
Discloses while you final wore flip-flops in a non-nautical setting.
Sobbed-During-“Nomadland” Passport
Identifies that you simply cried throughout Swankie’s farewell monologue.
Magic-Trick-on-a-First-Date Passport
Confirms that you’ve by no means carried out a card trick on a primary date with a possible romantic companion.
Reply-Guy Passport
Documents the final time you replied to a tweet with out even liking it first.
Parent-of-a-Child-with-a-Scooter Passport
Reveals whether or not you’re at present a caretaker of a velocity demon.
Slice-Enumerator Passport
Records the variety of consecutive days you’ve eaten solely pizza.
Potluck Passport
Shows whether or not the dishes you could have introduced to communal gatherings matched what you indicated you’ll be bringing within the pre-potluck Google Sheet.
Public-Toilet-Seat Passport
Catalogues while you final put your naked butt on the bathroom seat of a public toilet.
Pretended-to-Have-Seen-the-TV-Show-Everyone-Else-Was-Talking-About Passport
If true, you’re beneath necessary home arrest.
Chipotle-Test-Kitchen-for-Your-Anniversary-Dinner Passport
Verifies that you simply didn’t counsel the Chipotle take a look at kitchen in Greenwich Village as a location for an anniversary dinner in 2018.
Citizen Passport
Shows if in case you have the surveillance-state app Citizen in your cellphone.
Barber/Hairdresser Passport
Identifies whether or not whoever cuts your hair thinks you’re a very good individual.
Nicholas Sparks Passport
Certifies that you haven’t consumed media from the Nicholas Sparks cinematic universe up to now thirty days.
String-Cheese-as-an-Ingredient Passport
Discloses the final time you chopped up a chunk of Starbucks-branded string cheese to use in a dish you had been making ready.
Tipping Passport
Logs your historical past of tipping at drag reveals, automobile washes, and mixture drag present–automobile washes.
“The Da Vinci Code”-on-a-First-Date Passport
Confirms that you’ve by no means prompt watching Ron Howard’s two-hour-and-fifty-four-minute adaptation of Dan Brown’s novel on a primary date with a possible romantic companion.
Taco Bell Passport
Documents that you’re at present wholeheartedly residing más. ♦
