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Quantitative Reasoning
Jim makes $50,000 a year. His wife, Betsy, makes $40,000. They tithe to their church. How much do they have left to donate to the “Ron DeSantis for President” campaign, with its inspiring message of sending Joe Biden back to his basement in Delaware?
a) $81,000
b) The legal limit of $6,600, because they don’t know what a PAC is
c) A PAC is a patriotic way they can contribute all $90,000 and help their church more in the long run.
Major General Joseph Hooker entered the Battle of Chancellorsville with 130,000 troops to fight General Robert E. Lee’s force of 60,000 troops. Hooker lost 17,304 men; Lee lost 13,460, but won. How tall should the new statue of Lee be?
a) 6’1”
b) 10’
c) 1 foot taller than whatever Abraham Lincoln is in the Lincoln Memorial
The amount of carbon emitted into the atmosphere by a Ford F-350 is 10,000 pounds per 10,000 miles driven. A Nissan Leaf emits 3,600 pounds of carbon over 10,000 miles. How much carbon will Julio save if he drives the Nissan 30,000 miles instead of the Ford while running his small business?
a) How can he haul anything with a Nissan Leaf?
b) Nothing, compared with what Leonardo DiCaprio emits flying his private jet to Cannes.
c) Are we sure Julio is in this country legally?
Candidate A gets 13,000 votes. Candidate B gets 12,000 votes. Given the corruption of the élites in the deep state, which candidate should win?
a) Candidate A
b) Candidate B
c) Whoever drew the biggest crowds
Jane owns 12 guns. Jimmy owns 23 guns. Fred owns 128 guns. Who is the coolest?
a) Jane
b) Jimmy
c) Fred
d) The guns
Verbal Reasoning
This passage is from the 1946 classic Disney film “Song of the South”:
Why does that make the reader happy, whereas all the new Disney crap makes everyone sad? Is it because of:
a) Wokeness
b) All of the above
In the passage, why does the singer, Uncle Remus, declare that it is a “wonderful day”?
a) The plantation owners taught him useful skills.
b) The bird taught him that all lives matter.
c) His children will no longer be taught critical race theory.
Compare and contrast the following two passages:
John 3:16 : Philippians 4:13 ::
a) “Home Improvement” : “Last Man Standing”
b) Steve Spurrier : Tim Tebow
c) Garth Brooks : Morgan Wallen
d) Analogies are poor substitutes for Commandments.
What does the author mean by “strengtheneth”?
a) Make stronger
b) Make strengthener
c) Do not question God!
This passage is from the 2010 Supreme Court decision Citizens United v. F.E.C.:
The word “speaker” in the passage could refer to only one of the following:
a) A journalist
b) A whistle-blower
c) ExxonMobil
It doesn’t matter where this passage is from. It’s just terrific, so read it:
How is the person who gave this speech not leading in the polls? Should he:
a) Smile more
b) Criticize Trump
c) Not criticize Trump
d) Develop a “personality,” whatever his wife means by that
e) Completely focus on Iowa
f) Fire my campaign manager again
g) Get indicted for something
h) Cut an early deal to be Vice-President ♦
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